From Surviving to Thriving: Redefining Self-Care for Midlife Women

Are you willing to go to extreme lengths to care for a loved one, friend, or pet but will neglect your own care for weeks, months, and even years? Are you consistently at the bottom of your to-do list? 

Woman on couch with arms crossed looking pensive and tired

Image by freepik

Women are often taught to live and work at burnout levels. It becomes second nature. I know women (like myself) who are far more comfortable taking care of everything and everyone else's needs than they are their own. This approach is a handy excuse with two benefits: as an avoidance tactic, I don't have to look at what's going on inside me, and as an ego-booster, I juice the accolades for self-sacrificing in the service of others. That's my version of a win-win. 

Unfortunately, it requires a relentless pace that leaves little room for tending to my mental, physical, and emotional needs. If you adhere to this approach, you will likely find it only manages to keep you locked in a survival mode, which can profoundly affect your well-being. 

What if we learned a new behavior and created a culture where women take care of their needs and begin to transition from mere survival to thriving? How much better would the world be?  

The Reality of Burnout

In today's fast-paced world, many women are in a constant state of burnout, juggling demanding careers, family responsibilities, and societal expectations. This relentless drive to meet every obligation can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, and a feeling of perpetual exhaustion. Dr. Pooja Lakshmin, a psychiatrist and author, discusses this in her book Real Self-Care: Bubble Baths, Cleanses and Crystals Not Included. She emphasizes that self-care goes beyond temporary fixes like bubble baths and spa days. Truly caring for your own needs involves making sustainable changes that foster genuine well-being and addressing structural challenges that women face​​. 

The expectations we put on ourselves and the unfair rules of the game keep women at a disadvantage in situations where our success is impossible. At Here I Am, we acknowledge these structural barriers and strive to provide solutions that help women manage their everyday stressors while advocating for broader societal changes. Genuine self-care encompasses personal practices and collective efforts to create a more supportive environment for all women. We are stronger together.

Sustainable Self-Care Practices

Dr. Lakshmin teaches us that true self-care is about integrating sustainable practices into daily life. This includes setting boundaries, seeking support, and making time for activities that genuinely nourish the mind and body. She stresses that self-care is about taking control of one's needs in a realistic and meaningful way​, which is connected to Gloria Steinem's statement that "Power can be taken, but not given." Our self-care reflects our agency as women: we should not wait for someone else to "empower" us. We have power within our reach that can be used when necessary. 

Your ability to set boundaries and make time to nourish your mind and body requires thoughtful intention. We advocate for these sustainable self-care practices and offer a range of products that can help you on your journey. We designed our curated boxes to help women take advantage of the time they carve out for themselves. They are not a quick fix to your problems and should not be substituted for the ongoing, introspective work necessary for long-term well-being.  

A Note on Mental Health and Self-Care

Addressing mental health issues and seeking professional help when needed is a crucial component of genuine self-care. Dr. Lakshmin points out that stress and burnout can be signs of deeper problems that are often best addressed through therapy or other professional support​. We encourage women to consider these options.

Creating a Culture of Thriving

Our vision at Here I Am is to create a culture where women can move from a state of survival to one of thriving. This means encouraging women to care for their mental, physical, and emotional needs. 

Self-care is a journey, and we are here to support you every step of the way. With an intentional self-care practice, our products can be more than just temporary relief; they can support and enhance a holistic approach to health and well-being. By integrating self-care into daily life, women can build resilience and move towards a state of thriving.

Our Commitment

Here I Am is committed to offering self-care products that support midlife women's journey to emotional, physical, and mental well-being. Our products are sustainably made and ethically sourced, reflecting our dedication to individual and collective well-being.

We invite you to join us in redefining self-care and creating a culture where women can thrive. Together, we can move beyond survival and build a world where well-being is within reach for every woman.

For Further Info

The journey from burnout to thriving is not easy, but it is possible with the right support and resources. Here I Am is dedicated to providing products that help women on this journey. By addressing the structural challenges and integrating sustainable self-care practices, we can create a culture where women are not just surviving but thriving.

For further insights on sustainable self-care and structural challenges, Dr. Pooja Lakshmin's book Real Self-Care: Bubble Baths, Cleanses and Crystals Not Included offers valuable perspectives​ (available at​.
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